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Hanging out as friends vs dating

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You’ve been seeing each other for a while, and it’s going great! So him putting a penis inside you is probably just what friends do, and surely he does that to all of his buddies. He’s said things like, “You’d love my mom” and “Whoa, my ex-girlfriend never let me do that” and “[adult male crying noises].” Hmm. On one hand, it sounds like he wants to introduce you to his mom, and he thinks you do certain things better than his ex! Unfortunately, it could be a friend relationship, too, depending on his actual feelings and the amount of fear he has about entering into a relationship that happens to involve both feelings and sex. Honestly, this might be the first step toward actually making it official. This is definitely what friends do — they get scared when you ask a question that involves talking about their feelings and they run away after boning you and laughing at your jokes and telling you how smart you are for three months.

You’ve hooked up several times a week for several months; you like him and he likes you back.

I once found myself on a date that turned into a non-date the minute he told me all of his friends were meeting us at the concert. If the plan for your date was to go over to one of your places and cook dinner and watch a movie, fine. If colleague/co-worker/friend asks you to get together to talk business, that’s a non-date. You should not assume that there is any romantic future awaiting you on your non-date.

If he invited you and all your friends back to his place for some whiskey and mac n’ cheese, it’s most definitely a non-date. You’ve don’t leave the person’s apartment or dorm room. I am committed to making sure we’re not confusing dates and non-dates here.

Looks like you’re about to be in a relationship with this guy! On the other hand, he wrote you back and told you how he feels (sort of)! Looks like you’re well on your way to figuring out what’s going on with you and this guy. Spend all your time analyzing what he’s not giving you and let your unfounded assessment pave the way for your rocky future together — as friends, or as lovers who are just friends.

” and he wrote you back a day later and said, “This is a lot right now.” Hmm. On one hand, it seems like he’s not ready for a relationship, especially since it took him so long to respond.

So if you’re in the middle of telling a story and he’s half-listening while tapping on a screen, then he probably considers you a friend. He won’t be able to walk you to your doorstep for a cliché first kiss if you both take your own cars to Applebee’s.

If your outing was a real date, then he’d at least offer to drive you. If he stares at the waitress’ chest or tells you about the coworker he’s been crushing on, then he doesn’t see you in a romantic way.

After spending a night with you, he says, “Having sex with you is so much fun.” Hmm.

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If you were on a date, then he’d at least put in a little bit of effort. That means he’s worried about your opinion, which means he cares what you think, which means yes, it’s a date. When friends go out to eat, it’s every man for himself.

That’s why it’s definitely a date if he’s insisting on paying for your meal. If he invited his friends, a few cousins, and some strangers off of the street to go bowling with you, then it’s just a casual hangout session.