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So that’s been a great response.” “Overall, I’m not sure how much online dating can do to ‘fix’ dating,” Kay added.

“Online dating is simply a technological layer that helps to remove some friction in the space, and makes it easier for people to meet other people that they were already more or less looking to meet.

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Regardless of the type of app or site, online dating works better for some than others – a lot better, in fact.

If you’re a black woman, as I am, or an Asian man, Ok Cupid data shows you’re likely to receive fewer matches and messages. It became glaringly obvious that I was getting fewer matches and messages than non-black friends.

How would behaviours change if people were forced to recognise that you are consistently being rejected, not because of who you are but because of your race?

Chief among them was that I did not want to participate in platforms where users are given tools to discriminate based on race.

But so far, it hasn’t proven to be the greatest force for social change, other than by making data about trends more easily accessible, and opening up dialogues on important issues like these.” That last part has stuck with me.

The publication of data on users’ behaviour could be the first step to reducing racism and bias in online dating – and the cultivation of greater empathy may be key to reaching a solution.

I have desperately wished my friends and peers would more actively and deeply explore how profoundly this disparity in opportunity affects my life and those of millions of others – not to mention how it holds us all back from more equitable and enjoyable dating experiences.

What if online dating sites called on all users to consider what it means to be a black woman or an Asian man while swiping and messaging?